Author: Zimmy Kid
Censor: G
Genre: General
Chapter One
Disclaimer: I don't own anything.
The silent figure crept through the still night, making hardly any noise. All the tall buildings surrounded the figure as he snuck around the City. Then, it came into view. Zim's house. Dib grinned as he approached the glowing blue structure, this time with a plan that he knew for sure would work, partly due to some spying Dib had done before. He walked up to the door, knocked, and just as he expected, Zim's little robot answered. "Hiiiiiii!" it chirped. "Hi," Dib said. "Can I come in?" "OK, I wanna watch the Scary Monkey show!" Dib watched G.I.R. bounce around on its head, but suddenly stopped and flipped upright. "Wait!" G.I.R. said. Dib froze, thinking G.I.R. was going to go get Zim. "Master Zimmy said I'm not supposed to let anybody in the house while he's down in his lab." Dib let out a breath that he'd been holding. "No, I'm special," said Dib. "I'm here to fix Zim's...computer!" "Oh!" said G.I.R.
"I'm gonna go get him then!" "NO!!!!" Dib sreamed. Thinking that that one slip up might have blown his cover, Dib relied on his reasoning that G.I.R. was not very smart and what G.I.R. had said earlier, and crossing his fingers said, "I'll watch the Scary Monkey show with you first!" "YAY! OK, come on! An' I'm gonna sing the doom song!" G.I.R. proceeded to sing the entire doom song as it led Dib to the couch. Relieved, Dib knew now that his plan was going to work. As the Scary Monkey filled the screen, suddenly Dib heard footsteps. Zim.
Grabbing G.I.R., Dib dashed out the door, being sure to keep his hand over G.I.R.'s mouth. When they were well out of range of Zim's house, Dib removed his hand from G.I.R.'s mouth. "Where we going? To the store? I wanna BrainFreezy!" Dib grinned evily. "No, we're going someplace much better." They arrived at Dib's house and Dib burst in the door, slamming it behind him. He ran up the stairs to his room, and when he got there, went inside, shutting the door. He set G.I.R. down on his desk.
"OK, um. In order to fix Zim's stuff, I need to know some things about him!" said Dib, putting a video camera aimed at G.I.R. on his bed. "OK!" said G.I.R. "But can I have a BrainFreezy first?" "No," said Dib. "I'll reward you with one! Now, OK. What planet are you and Zim from?" Dib smiled as G.I.R. gave away the answer to the things he actually remembered: Zim's secrets. "We're from Irk!" "Where is Irk?" "About 85 million miles from here!" "Good job. What's the secret to getting past Zim's computer?" "Holding a soda!" "Ooh, I love this. OK, does Zim keep any weapons upstairs?" "Under the couch cushion!" "OK. Good G.I.R-" "Do I get my BrainFreezy now?" "No, G.I.R... It's gonna be hard having you around."
Chapter Two
"G.I.R.!" yelled Zim. "G.I.R.! Where are you?" Zim scanned the room, then sighed. "He's probably getting one of those horrible BrainFreezys...Ugh!" Then, Zim went back down to his lab to plot ways to take over the Earth. The next day, Zim put his disguise on and went back to the living room, yelling, "G.I.R.!" G.I.R. was nowhere to be seen still. Zim just shrugged it off and went to Skool. When he arrived, a folded up note was on his desk. Zim unfolded it and read:
Come to my house with no disguise and you'll get your robot back. If you don't, I'll hurt it then expose you the hard way.
"Dib!" growled Zim. "He has G.I.R. and. Oh well. I don't need it.And how could he get proof from G.I.R.?" The rest of the day went by fairly quickly, without Zim even noticing Dib was absent...
"I wanna BrainFreezy!" "Shut up!" Dib had had G.I.R. in his possession for barely a day, but already the robot was getting on his nerves. "Zim'll come, he'll get you back, but then I'll have proof, I'll take a picture of him with no disguise on, and then I'll have proof! Proof, finally! And then, he'll go to the autopsy table, and finally..." Dib threw his head back and laughed maniacally. G.I.R. watched Dib, and started laughing too. "You aren't supposed to laugh!" Dib said, exasperated. "Why?" asked G.I.R. "AUGH! I wish Zim had a smart robot!" yelled Dib, forgetting that if Zim did have a smart robot he wouldn't be where he was then. G.I.R. jumped off Dib's desk. "I'm gonna sing the doom song now! Doom, doom doom, doom, doom, doom, doom doom DOOM! Doomy doom doom..." As it sang, G.I.R. bounced around Dib's room on his head. Dib collapsed on his bed. "Why me?" he moaned.
Later that day, Dib had G.I.R. in a box, with a large Chocolate Bubblegum BrainFreezy. G.I.R. wouldn't shut up with no BrainFreezy. Gaz was out, and Professor Membrane was doing an experiment, so Dib was alone. He walked outside, with G.I.R.'s box, sat down, and waited. Zim wasn't going to come. But Dib didn't know that. After sitting out untill 3:00 A.M., Dib fell asleep. The next morning, Dib jolted awake around 8:30. "What happened...G.I.R.!" Dib felt for G.I.R.'s box. It'd be just like Zim to come in the dead of night and steal G.I.R. back while he was asleep...He let out a sigh of relief when he felt the cardboard. G.I.R. was still there. Good. Zim didn't come. Bad. Dib rubbed his eyes, picked G.I.R.'s box up, and staggered inside and up to his room. He undid the tape, opened the box and took G.I.R. out. G.I.R. was sleeping, and even Dib had to admit that the sleeping G.I.R was pretty adorable. Dib sighed, grabbed G.I.R., and shook it. "Wha...Master! What? Where's master?" asked G.I.R. Dib knew it was mean, but he said, "Your master doesn't like you. You're mine now, G.I.R." "What?" "Your master had a chance to rescue you, but he didn't." As Dib talked, he eased a baseball bat out from under his bed. "I don't want to do this, but your master made me!" Dib grinned evilly as he got into a baseball stance with the now fully emerged bat. As G.I.R. said, "What?", Dib swung the bat with all his might. There was a sickening crunch of wood on cheap, flimsy metal as the bat hit G.I.R. full force. The impact was so strong, G.I.R. was knocked off the desk and onto the floor. Oil started to leak out of G.I.R.'s head. Its eyes flashed red once, returned to their original blue, and finally, went black. G.I.R. let out a little 'ow' then was silent. There was a possibility "Ow" might have been G.I.R.'s last word...
Chapter Three
The next day, Dib was at Skool, and another note, this one in an envelope, was on Zim's desk. Zim took the envelope and started to open it, but Mrs. Bitters swooped down on him. "Whatever that is, it can wait." Mrs. Bitters took the envelope, set it on her desk, and went in to a 'Earth Will Implode On You' lecture untill 12:00. "Go now," she said. Zim went, but when Mrs. Bitters wasn't looking, he snatched the note off her desk and ran. When he reached the cafeteria and got his mustard and spinach, he sat down and opened the envelope. He took out a piece of lined paper and read:
"What?" Zim asked. "That was terrible poetry." He put the note and the envelope down, but saw something sticking out of the envelope. He pulled it out, and saw it was a picture of G.I.R., in the critical condition he was in. His mouth dropped open. He knew Dib would at least kidnap G.I.R., but kill it? A lot of his problems would be solved with no G.I.R., but Zim had come to like the little guy, and was VERY mad. Fuming silently, he devised a plan.
"Mrs. Bitters?" "What, Zim." Zim took a breath. What? "Um...I don't feel good!" Zim patted himself on the back in his mind for that. "And you expect me to believe that." Zim cursed in Irken language, then remembered Plan B, in case whatever excuse he thought up didn't work. He smiled. How many humans would of thought of stealing the lunch lady's red food coloring she used for her Jell-o? He made sure nobody was looking, unscrewed the cap, and squirted red on his desk and a little on his face. "Mrs. Bitters? I have a nosebleed." Zim smiled to himself. Many of his classmates had gotten excused because of 'nosebleeds'. "How could you have a nosebleed if you don't have a nose?" Dib scoffed. But Mrs. Bitters paid no attention and said, as she threw the necklace hall pass at Zim, "Go to the nurse." Zim smiled and walked out. He remembered his plan: Get out of class. Check. Sneak out of Skool. Run to Dib's. Find G.I.R. Take it home. Make it well. Zim started running down the hallway, and only stopped when he ran into the Skool doors. He opened them the right way and dashed the way to Dib's house.
Chapter Four
Zim burst out of the Skool doors and stopped, gasping for breath. He'd been running nearly as fast as he could go in his VootRunner. He remembered G.I.R. He ran off again.
Dib dropped his pencil. He suddenly realized Zim was faking, he wasn't going to the nurse's office, and he was going to try to get G.I.R. back for free. He jumped up without even getting a hall pass and ran out the door at the same speed as Zim.
Zim was about five blocks away from Dib's.
Dib was on Willow street, about five blocks from his house.
Zim reached Dib's and dashed in the front door.
Dib reached his house and ran in the back door.
Both ran up the stairs in to Dib's room.
"It's YOU." They both dropped to the linoleum floor panting after that sentence. Dib looked over at Zim. He had forgotten to wash the blood off his face and looked like some bloodthirsty homicidal maniac. ( Hi, JTHM fans! ^_^ ) "You look like some bloodthirsty homicidal maniac," Dib said, repeating his thought. "You look like-uh-um..." Dib smirked. "Can't say anything about ME, Zim!" "You look like you, which is just as scary as any homicidal maniac!" Dib made a mental note that Zim was a good comebacker. Zim stood up, and saw G.I.R. on Dib's desk. "G.I.R.!" he cried, and ran to get G.I.R. Dib suddenly stepped in Zim's way. "Uh, uh, uh! You aren't getting G.I.R. without a fight!" A course of energy ran through Zim. "Yeah. What kind of fight?" "A fist fight. No gadgets. If you win, I'll give back G.I.R. and won't bother you for a month-" Dib cleverly flipped a tape recorder on,"-and if I win, I keep G.I.R., show it to the world, and you will be forced to get me a picture of you with no disguise." Zim was so mad and felt so hotheaded that he didn't think about what he was saying. "Deal," he growled. Dib grinned evily. "Excellent."
Your robot is in my possesion.
Your secret is on the line.
The autopsy table is near, Zim.
And with me that is just fine.
Your little robot was led
To my house, where fuel's leaking out of its head.
If you want him again
The thing you'll have to do then
Is sacrifice yourself to be dead.
Dib and Zim stood in opposite corners of the room. Dib said, "Ready, set, go." They charged each other. Zim tackled Dib, but Dib came back with a sharp punch to Zim's mouth. Zim punched his nose.
Dib scratched Zim's arm. Zim kicked Dib in...um...that one special place. And the fight raged on, until after four minutes, Dib was sitting on Zim. Dib had chose the one thing young invaders never learned about in Invader School. Who'd need their fists with the nifty little spider legs in their backpacks? Dib had won. "I won, Zim!" sneered Dib. "Now, you promised! Where's that camera!" "I never promised!" said Zim, shifting a little as Dib got off of him. "Oh, but you did!" Dib said gleefully, replaying the tape recorder tape. "I did." Zim tried to move. It was hard. He saw G.I.R. With all his remaining strength, when Dib wasn't looking, Zim hauled himself up, snatched G.I.R., and ran as fast as he could out to Dib's shouts of "Hey!" Zim reached Dib's door and ran out, closely followed by Dib. When they reached Zim's house, Dib tripped on a lawn gnome. "You prominsed, Zim!" cried Dib, staring at Zim, safely leaning against his door. "I don't play by the rules, Dib. I never did, and you're crazy to expect me to." With that, Zim went in his door, leaving a bruised Dib draped over the gnome.
Chapter Five
Zim dashed down to his lab, carrying G.I.R. He set the little robot down on a counter.
"Computer! G.I.R.'s been hurt, and it's really bad! I need help!" A robotic arm lifted G.I.R. and placed it on a small thing resembling a stretcher. It started rolling, Zim closely following. The arm lifted G.I.R. into a small air tank.
"Sir, there is really nothing more that we can do. You can try, if you want."
"What?!?!?" screamed Zim. "What kind of computer ARE you?!?!?!" Zim sighed, and took G.I.R. out of the air tank. He got his tools, and gently opened G.I.R.'s head.
"Oh no...he's lost a LOT of oil..." Zim immediately called, "Computer! Bring me about a gallon of oil on the double!" In seconds a bucket of oil was on the table next to G.I.R. Zim first checked to see it was the right kind. It was. Zim was glad he'd went to Invader School. In Invader School, all Irkens are taught how to invade, but every Irken specialized in a topic. Zim specialized in mechanics. He opened G.I.R.'s mini oil can inside him for emergencies only, and filled it up to the top. Then, just in case, he put an Irken paralysis on G.I.R.'s body. He then started fixing the dent in G.I.R.'s head with a hammer.
When that was done, Zim sighed. "So far, so good." Using a screwdriver, he fastened G.I.R.'s head back on. "Computer, bring me a small bathtub and another gallon of oil." The computer thought the request was a tad strange, but soon the items were on the table. "OK..." Zim poured the oil into the bathtub, then put G.I.R. in. It always helped robots to soak in oil. He thoroughly washed G.I.R. in the oil, dried it off, then put it in the air tank again. G.I.R. looked as good as new, except for the fact its eyes were black and it wasn't moving.
"Computer, every five minutes report G.I.R.'s condition to me starting now," said Zim.
"G.I.R. is in stable condition."
"Good!" said Zim.
He walked to the tube that would take him back upstairs, but then the computer urgently said, "G.I.R. has slipped back into critical condition!"
"What?!" screamed Zim. He ran to G.I.R.'s air tank. "It looks fine to me, what's wrong?" asked Zim.
"It's suffering a severe allergic reaction from that oil. He wasn't fully healed when he started suffering the effects. Chances are, sir, I'm sorry to say, it's not going to make it."
"What? That was the right kind! No!" Zim said. He attached a sort of robot heart rate monitor to G.I.R.'s chest. His 'heart' was not good. It sped up so fast it would have been a straight beepbeepbeepbeepbeep on a human heart monitor, then it slowed so much it almost flatlined. "Come on, G.I.R.! You can make it..." Zim whispered, completely forgetting his 'Never show emotion' rule for himself. G.I.R.'s 'heart' finally got steady.
"Whew," sighed Zim.
Suddenly, it stopped.
Completely flat-lining. The computer had put the robotic hand on Zim's shoulder. "I'm so sorry, sir...for sure he's gone."
Chapter Six
"No," whispered Zim. "You're lying!" But Zim knew it was true. His computer had never really been wrong. (Actually, it had, but in extremely rare occasions.) Zim tried not to show his emotions as he got some bubble wrap to put the body of G.I.R. in. He wrapped G.I.R. up and went back upstairs. He put G.I.R. on the floor and sat on the couch.
He turned the TV on to pass the time. It was so boring without G.I.R. around. It was set on G.I.R.'s favorite channel, and the Scary Monkey filled the screen. Zim quickly shut it off. Memories flooded Zim's mind. G.I.R. watching the Scary Monkey Show...G.I.R. bouncing around on its head....G.I.R. emptying its fuel tank to store some extra tuna...G.I.R. messing the robot parents' heads up...G.I.R. baking the cake for Keef...G.I.R. leaving the door and window open so Dib could get in...G.I.R. as the 'Government Man'.... Zim remembered them all too well. G.I.R. seemed to be everywhere. Its ghost haunted Zim's house. Zim struggled not to think about little G.I.R., but was having an extremely hard time not.
Zim turned the TV on again, but quickly changed the channel. The news was on. "And after taking a physical exam, President Bush is in perfect health," said the announcer. "What'd they do, water it good?" muttered Zim, and shut the TV off. He sat alone in silence, which would normally be broken in two seconds by G.I.R.-Zim sharply told himself to 'quit thinking about G.I.R., you idiot!' He just sat there for a few minutes, and thought how boring things were without G.I.R. He couldn't make some kind of chip, keep G.I.R. from getting in trouble, or just be plain annoyed by the little robot. What else was there to do? He turned the TV on again. The news had switched to a baseball game. It was just reshowing footage of a foul ball bouncing back and cracking the camera lens. Completely uninterested, Zim turned the TV off once again.
If only. Two little words. How come they could cause so much regret? If only he had considered G.I.R.'s mistakes more and remembered G.I.R.'s brain was as good as that of a two year old's. If only Zim hadn't thought G.I.R. would be fine, that G.I.R. would've been able to get out of that mess, beat Dib. G.I.R. wasn't that intellegent. He should've known that! If only Zim had realized how much he liked G.I.R.
Right when Zim was just about to actually start crying, he heard a faint pop-pop-pop-pop from across the room. Zim jumped up. "Who's there?" he yelled. "Computer, are you having some kind of malfunction?" The computer scanned itself. "In perfect health, sir," it said. Suddenly, Zim felt a burst of excitement as he realized the only other thing it could be... He ran over to G.I.R.'s bubble wrap and dumped G.I.R. out. G.I.R. blinked. "Aww... my bubbles," said the little robot. Zim stared at G.I.R. "How are you...you're supposed to be...G.I.R.!" Zim grabbed G.I.R. "How are you alive?!?!?!" G.I.R. blinked. "Well, there was this darky thingy and I saw the Scary Monkey Show and then I saw light and was with those bubbly thingys and then you took them away. Can I have my bubbly thingys back?" "Sure..." "YAY!" G.I.R. grabbed the bubble wrap and started popping it.
Zim leaned against the wall. How could G.I.R. be alive? It was for sure dead! Maybe...it couldn't be! But it maybe it could... There was a rumor that in all the S.I.R. units, there was a one-in-a-million chance that a S.I.R. was a special S.I.R. Those extremely rare special S.I.R.s had an incredible healing power, an incredible will to live. Those robots were extremely special, really one in a million. Nobody would ever know if a S.I.R. was a special S.I.R. untill it's in a life-or-death situation. However, it only worked once. But just maybe G.I.R. was one of those special S.I.R.s.
G.I.R. put down the bubble wrap. "Ooh, the Scary Monkey Show's on in five minutes!" it chirped. "G.I.R., wait," croaked Zim. "Do you know what you did?" G.I.R. looked around. "No." "Well, you got seriously hurt by Dib. Then I tried to repair you, but something went wrong and then, supposedly you...died. And then, now, you're alive again, G.I.R. It's really in fact a near miracle." G.I.R. looked up. "Can I watch the Scary Monkey Show?" asked G.I.R. "Did I say you couldn't?" replied Zim. "YAY!" said G.I.R., and ran off. Zim walked off to go down to his lab to research the special S.I.R.s
He found out that they are created by being exposed to unfamiliar items when they are being made (Of course, G.I.R. had junk in its brain, so that is very well possible). Zim had figured it out. There was no other possible way; G.I.R. was a special S.I.R. Although G.I.R. had that special talent, Zim knew G.I.R. had already used it. Then he thought back to before, how he had been knowing G.I.R. was gone, all the things he was feeling. And he needed to show G.I.R. that; prove he wasn't just a heartless short little Irken. That he did have feelings, that he did like G.I.R. and really enjoyed its company. He went back upstairs and walked into the living room, where G.I.R. was staring intently at the TV screen where the Scary Monkey was in all its monkeyish glory. "G.I.R.," said Zim, I have something to tell you. G.I.R. actually managed to pull itself from the image and say, "What, master?"
"G.I.R., said Zim, "I love you."
***************The End*****************
Author's Note: Aaaaawww. That ending made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. I know, that was completely OOC for Zim, but it WAS sweet, yes? Anyway, thank you to all those people who gave me nice reviews. That kept me going (and so did a few personal email threats). Thank you all and keep reading my works! Please! (Hey, I remembered to say Please!) Zimmy Kid, signing off!